I'll bring you back to the stars.

R E S P E C T ! ! !

Maverick has succeeded in breaking the world record time for the longest mixing hours which is a total of 72 hours. Unfortunately his attempt to also break the unofficial word record time could not be met. Only a near 53 minute miss which could post him as the World Record holder. Nevertheless his efforts were not in vain as he has gain the respect of many as well as myself. Only a crazy fisherman/coffeeshopman could ever be insane enough to try such things. *hats off to you maverick* U're the MAN! Oh yeah i guess his name should be in the Guinness Book of Records. *prays hard*

Today is the day most have been waiting for. A day which is filled with endless parties not only here locally but abroad everywhere as well. Today is the last day of the year 2003 and i hope that everyone of you out there would end it to the fullest with heaps of fun. Tonight will be a hard banging night as MoFarCore takes it's place at barcode. I foresee ben's gonna have tons of fun. *hee hee*

At times i wonder how's being good would benefit oneself in the long run when the harder u try to help the more u get fucked, the more u get lied to, the more dissapointing news u'll receive. If being nice and all helpful brings about these factors then i would rather be by myself. It's draining yet again which is why i'm just gonna remain me.

Despite of it's uniqueness of a once a year thingy, this time around i don't really feel all that christmassy. It's not based purely on depression but mainly cause probably so many things have happened during my course of bumming. Yeah of course there's still a pinch of extra jolliness in me as of yesterday afterall it is my favourite day of the year besides September 11.

To me santa is sure as hell real and that is one of the main reason why Christmas is really personal. Be it physical or mental projection but yeah he lives in me. I mean comon, he's never potrayed as being a depressed / unhappy fucker who wishes nothing but death upon people. Instead he's always filled with joy and happiness which is the reason why he keeps laughing and giving presents to everyone especially kids! On the wilder side, santa is one of the luckiest person alive. Why u ask? Because, fuck man!, heaps of people sits on his god damn lap! Put aside kids and guys, i'm talking bout tEh chicks who are still kids inside and enjoys nothing better then sitting on santa's lap. Santa u rule!

Aside from that mental opinion, i would like to believe that this day resides hope in me that there are still some good left in everyone. That there still exist a disturbing conscience inside which keeps ponding hard into arrogant individuals who are being all mean and nasty. A believe that you can be that little change in someone's life just by being available. It's the only hope left which still puts a smile on my face no matter how much i try frowning.

In short, Merry Christmas again! Be generous and nice to everyone around you. Keep your heads high and be proud!

Me, Mac (Pat's sister), and Pat at Chill


Me and Jia Nee at Chill


Leong at Viva


Me and Leong at Viva


Stupid Leong, Pat, Me and Sui Lin


Me and Eddie


Joyce and Mary


Joyce, Me, and Mary


Nick @ Ganjaguru


Kenneth @ Xt-acid and Gary @ feilou on tEh decks!


MofarCore 5! Don't miss it! Details Below

Click here for more pixs!

Picture paints a thousand words. I definitely had fun last night/this morning. First Chill, then Vivas then ended the night at barcode. The Bass Agents were spinning there in conjunction with Eddie's Birthday + Graduation Party. They were practically owning the crowd by pumping hard trance/NRG/house/core tunes the entire night. It was a night of endless multi-indulgence.



*MofarCore V

Djs : Feilou / Ganjaguru / Xt-Acid / Didjital
Venue : Barcode
Date : 31/12/03 New Years Eve
Time : 10 - A.L.A.P
Cover : RM100 (Guys) / RM 80 (Ladies) *Ladies free entry before 11:00 p.m

Free Flow of beer till stock last

*MofarCore has continued it's journey to promise an unforgettable event to you hard punters out there for a mind blowing and mental intrusion experience. Allow and prepare yourself to be enlightened and uplifted by the edectic hard anthems brought to you by The Bass Agents.

There are times where i would feel really excited over the slightest thing and there would also be times where i can't seem to even smile at anything even if i tried really hard. Christmas is around the corner and so is new year yet i'm hardly even worked up the slightest bit. Something doesn't seems in place i can't stick my finger to it. Usually Christmas would be THE happiest day of the year for me as it strangely gives me a really positive/optimistic vibe.

It moles me to the extent if i don't see a Christmas tree in my own home i would start going ballistic. Beats me concerning this weird encounter. I don't even understand it myself. Maybe cause during my days of being brain-washed i would automatically expect that Christmas is a time of joy and happiness. This time around it doesn't seem that way anymore. Too much wah loi toi drama probably to say to the least. Hell i don't think i'm mentally and emotionally prepared for what tEh promised day has installed for me.

Everything seems to be in place as days go by. *scratched head* There's still something wrong somewhere and the fact that i can't firgure out the very essence of it is really pisses me off. I should probably be happy that things aren't as bad as before. But guess what, i'm not. For the crave of perfection resides in me. It is the outings which compensates for mentalness whenever i'm left with no one but myself.

I just obtained my first Digicam today! hoooray for me! Yeah and i just scratched it as well, not forgetting Leong who klutzed it at Chills earlier tonight. *bangs head on the table* Anyway as most should already be familiar, Atmosphere was having a rave last night which was infested with tons of uncontrollable crowd. The tunes were of course not my cup of tea as i'm really shallow on choosing the right vibe, but friends were abunden which compensates heaps. So yeah these are some pictures for you guys.


Me and tEh group chilling at Atmos


Calene and Me. *were actually checking out chicks*


Joyce and Me *The fairy and the pony*


Sui Lin and Keishi *yaoooosahhh!*


Sam and Don *Cops everywhere!*


Edwin and Johnson *Stoning*

Was a night of endless fun i swear! Although yeah i looked a little confined at times, but it was not doubt enjoyable. Bar Savanh (is that how u spell it?) was, to my shock, really nice. Appearance-wise nothing less then being really authentic and cozzy, with huge chill-out sofas to accustome large crowds, not forgetting massive tables with endless booze. It was seriously a multicultural night where everyone were present.

Gavin, with only one shot of tequila and few sips of vodka, got high and red really fast. Persisting on lame pick up lines with poor lynn. It was a dead ended situation with confirmfail.com lines. hee hee! Hilarious! Leong was drowned with heaps of bags on his lap which made him look really stupid. lol! Lynn slapped Gavin with Leong's help. Crist was player mode = on. Sui Lin couldn't stop laughing which got really out of hand till it spreaded to me. Like i said, if i was to die, this is sure hell the way to go man. Oh ya, i just noticed that Lynn gets really hostile when she's tipsy/drunk/intoxicated. People got burnt girl! =D hahahahha!

I met, Pete Teo there who seriously posed a disturbing resemblance of William Dafoe (Green Goblin), BadBoyBen who was really friendly, WooKooKoo who was a little koo koo yeah!, and some who i can only remember vaguely. Extremely friendly people which made the night more enjoyable. It was certainly an experience which differs from others. I can safely say that i had fun.

p/s : Sorry for the disorientated post as i'm still laughing now thanks to sui. *stomach painnnnnn*

Mind the topic, i thought 'that' saying was pretty cool on the drama side. It has certainly been a excruciating week for me. Confused by nature, corrected by facts. As some would know, it's been a little different of lately as things shouldn't be the same anymore. Although it is supposedly preached as being natural, hell it's still a little of a getting used to kinda thing. I believe what i've left behind to be cynical as oppose to others who may regard it as true bahaviour. I'll admit that i'm a little skeptical bout the whole thing, mainly cause i've never looked at things THIS way before, but hell i'm sure it's no harm trying.

If being a sincere individual should include emotions/actions such as caring, selfless, kindred, humble, listening, giving, feeling, disregarding, accepting, loving, truthful, polite, nodding, sucking, basically giving a shit, then i would say i've so far lived my life in full. Although yeah, what i've stated proves to be nothing more then being a little controversial but normaly sincerity is cursed with these options as it comes with the package. Probably having too many of those did screwed up a little. Everything should be at a balance to what i've learnt.

' Wisest is he who knows he does not know || One thing only i know, and that is that i know nothing '

Sow and i were up for our daily(well almost) walks at his field last night. It was of course raining fairly heavy as it's beginning to be an everynight routine. So yeah the highlight of the night while we were just starting to walk :-


Rain drizzles

Sow : Eh Ben, i think i'm gonna stay at home, got something to do

Ben : Like what lah mah hai

Sow : Like wait for the rain to stop!

Ben : *shit man, don think it'll rain heavy right? probably it'll stay a minor drizzle* no no come come we have to be hardcore!

Starts walking towards the field

Sow : *grumbles grumbles*

Hear rain noices from afar

Sow : Do u hear that?! Do u know what's that or not?

Ben : Fuck man what sound is that lah. Like coming nearer!

Sow : It's the sound of fucked-up.com coming this way man!

SPLASH!!!!!!!


Yeah we were practically drench all over but yeah we kept going since we're hardcore and of course stupid. Hell we're leet okay!!

p/s: Just had a really disturbing revelation just now. Fuck i'm just going to head back to Sophie's World.

Through out the entire extent of my LONG holiday, the lesson/advice which proved to be really meaningful to me was |Life is all about ups and downs. When u're at your peak, u're bound to go through a dead period of slump. When u're at your lowest, there'll be a time where u'll trip madly at it's highest. So, whenever u're at a bottom which u can't seem to escape, look at it as an opportunity.|

Currently i'm just standing firm, hoping and praying that my trip would finally hit. I know that it's out there searching for me. Waiting for the perfect timing to merge as promised. Patience is a virtue most needed especially when u're out of it. Like i said, standing firm and witnessing the miracle of life unfold itself unto to those who craves for it.